For me to Live...

Last Wednesday I was told that I needed to go to the ER because the swelling and pain in my jaw had not gone down after three days of taking medication. As I helped pack my daughters diaper bag to drop her with some friends I remembered that only six months ago my brother had went to the ER for something that we all thought was simple but twenty-one days later he was in heaven. I was faced with the reality that maybe God's will for me was to be with Him. As I kissed my daughter I realized that I might not again. I was so torn because I wanted so much to be wife and mommy yet the thought of being with my Heavenly Father was awesome. My husband and I sat in the ER before my Cat Scan and EKG talking about this and he mentioned Phil. 1:21"For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. On some small scale I started to realize what this verse meant for Paul when he wrote it and for me today. I praise the Lord for allowing me to come home that night and to see my baby girl again but most of all for putting this "trial" in my life to help me understand this verse a little better and to be reminded of my purpose while I am on this earth; glorify God, seek souls for Him, train and disciple my daughter in the things of Him, serve my husband, daughter, friends, family and those I don't even know, etc. Praise the Lord that He keeps showing me where I need to grow to become more like Him!